Finding my "Inner Nerd" || #BehindTheBlogger

"NERDINESS"...

The word “NERD” is associated with several common stereotypes.
And I certainly don't identify with any of them.

I’ve never enjoyed science, and even the simplest math gives me horrible anxiety!
I have no desire to spend a day playing video games.
I strongly dislike sci-fi and comic book related things…both books and movies {Star wars? Batman? Forget it! I'm out!}
I have zero understanding of what it is people like about Anime or Manga!
I'm not socially inept by any means.
And I'm definitely nothing like Urkel from Family Matters…

BUT…MY inner nerd…is something I'm actually kind of proud of!

So while I wouldn't spend an entire day “gaming”, or standing in a mile long line waiting for a comic book convention while wearing a costume, there are several things that I WOULD devote a whole day to if I had the opportunity…

Listening to oldies…

I am more familiar with songs from the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s than I am with any of the music today. In fact, any music from the last 10 years, my “liking” of it is very selective. Personally, I just think music from the generations before mine was so much better!

Reading Classic literature…

Give me Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Anne of Green Gables, Little Women…or anything even remotely similar…any day! All of the main characters are so identifiable even today. I think I enjoy the fact that women so long ago were still struggling with a lot of the same problems we struggle with today. Back in the civil war era, the Victorian era, and even before all of that…someone understood! And I love that! Besides that, I just love the way they talked and acted, and the clothing they wore in those times. I often wish we could go back to that. Added bonus...old books are just really beautiful to me.

Or just reading books in general, really…

I can be really picky about books that I like, especially if they are more contemporary…but I have an entire list on Goodreads! And if I had a whole day, oh believe me I would read the books from my list!

Watching Disney movies…

I'm fairly certain I had every line and lyric of Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, and all the other classic princess movies memorized by the time I was 10 years old. I was pretty much obsessed! And still am. Nowadays I have pretty much memorized every single Disney movie in existence {well okay…with a few exceptions maybe}, because I have an auditory memory that I take a lot of pride in :)). And I still could watch them all over and over and never really get sick of them. Plus if I could go to Disney World all the time, I totally would! And if that makes me “childish” I'm absolutely fine with that! I'll use the verse in Matthew 18, where we are called to be like little children, to justify that ;))

Listening to Broadway Soundtracks…

I think this qualifies me to be a Musical Theatre nerd, and I'll take that label! Wicked, Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, Rent, Hairspray, Mamma Mia, Lion King, Sound of Music…Give me all of them and then more! If musicals were my only given option for something to listen to for the day, I'd be incredibly content with that. I'd have so much to choose from and endless enjoyment from it!

Antique Shopping…

Just let me buy all the pretty Victorian and turn of the century things!! All the beautiful tea sets, old typewriters, phones, and floral home décor!

Attending the symphony, the opera, or the ballet…

…before I would go to any other concert or performance, this is what I would pick! And I would be wide-eyed and on the edge my my seat, enjoying every last note, and every last step.

Correcting people's grammar...
"Grammar nerd" is what I would be called here.
So maybe I wouldn't spend the entire day doing this, and mostly because I'm too nice {ha!}. But I certainly do see a lot of very poor sentence structure throughout the day all over social media that I just wish I could correct people on! Let me just say this people...punctuation is your friend. It helps the rest of us so we don't have to just guess where the end of your sentence is. Dictionaries are also your friend. Correct spelling is a happy thing. And with that, I'll end this passive aggressive soap box moment :))

***

Okay so there may be one thing that would definitely put me in the stereotypes of “nerdiness”…

And that is that I do love Renaissance fairs! Now I may not geek out enough to go dressed in full costume like a princess {although I might even still do that!} but I get really excited about them, and I get so fascinated by what I find there. And at the very least I'll wear a flower crown like this one here…

So what about you? Can you identify with any of these things I've listed here? I'd love to know what we have in common!

Or maybe you identify with a different “nerd type” ;))

I'd love to hear about you too!

Thank you for reading a story from #BehindTheBlogger Hop. Every 2 weeks a group of bloggers is given a writing prompt. These prompts are very open ended, so our bloggers can write about whatever they desire. The main rule is that their blog post directly relates to the topic of that week. The point of this hop is for our readers to get to know us on a personal level.  Please hop along and read all of the blog posts in this weeks hop. Just click the links below. If you want real and raw emotion, then you will find it here. After you read each post, please comment and share. We want to get to know you too!

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Grieving the Living || #BehindTheBlogger

A Letter to my friend who has disappeared...

Remember when I used to spend every single weekend at your house?

Remember all the inside jokes we had...and the millions of things we laughed about that nobody else ever understood?

Remember when you would be the first person I would call for every...little...thing? Something wonderful happened and you were the first to know. Something terrible happened and you were the first to know. Something not even that significant happened and you were still the first to know. 

Remember when you were the one who knew me better than anyone else?

I do miss you. I really really do. 

It's been so weird starting to plan my wedding without you. I didn't even call you when I got engaged. I just didn't know how to tell you. I always thought that you would be the one by my side, helping me plan everything...standing up next to me when I got married...tearing up the dance floor with me. But it's not turning out that way. And that's sad for me. 

And even more so, it's been very sad to not be able to share with you all of the other incredibly exciting things happening in my life. The confidence I've obtained, and the competitions and auditions I've partaken in as a result of that newfound confidence. The newfound freedom I've discovered, and unspeakable joy that truly does exist...and that I wish, more than anything, you could find too.

I don't want to tell you things anymore, because I am afraid of making you feel worse. Even though you would be the first one to tell me that I should never minimize my own happiness!

See, my life is so different now. But I really miss having you in it. It has been so very difficult knowing that you are still in such darkness, and that I STILL cannot do anything about it. I STILL cannot help you. And oh, if I could only share with you how beautiful and sweet the taste of freedom is! If I could only help you take that step of allowing the walls around your heart to come down, and allowing God to invade every space and take full ownership of your broken heart. If you could only know what that is like...to come out of the dark and into the light! Oh, it exists! It's the most beautiful,  indescribable experience! But I just fear that even if I tried to share all of this with you, you would still believe that you are too far gone...too broken...too long in the depths to believe the Truth. So I struggle to pick up the phone and call, even though I've learned to recognize God's promptings, and He's been putting you back on my heart more and more. Still my heart hurts too much to see you right now, so I've been ignoring His knocks and His whispers of, "Pick up that phone." It's still too hard, although I'm kind of ashamed to admit it, to be around you right now. 

Honestly, I still wait for the day that I'll get a phone call telling me that you're gone...that you've given up. And I imagine the grief I would experience...the kind of grief that I could never see going away. But see, the thing is, I'm already grieving. Because in a way, I've already lost you. I've lost what used to be the greatest friendship. I miss you so much, but I'm just scared that if I call you or try to see you, you'll just say no because you're feeling too badly. And that's going to make me hurt...again. I know very well that it would be an act of obedience to the Lord if I tried to reconnect with you. But I have to confess that I have doubts that it's going to do any good at all. 

I hope that I can allow God to change my heart towards this situation. He's changed my heart in so many other ways. But right now I continue to hold onto the pain I associate with you and our past relationship. 

Remember when we were the absolute best of friends? Because I do. And I grieve that time. I grieve you, this person who is alive, yet still gone. I hope you'll come back. Come out of this darkness, into His marvelous light. And I hope I'll be brave enough to reach out again, and help you get there. 

But here's the hardest part of this to admit...I'm scared that you think I'm just another person who has left you. I didn't tell you some of the most important experiences I've had recently, and I wonder if maybe you think it's because I don't care anymore. That I've forgotten you. I wish I could convey how untrue that it. But there...there's the real reason I'm afraid to call.

Memories are everywhere. Songs we used to sing and dance to together come on the radio. Dialogue in movies and tv shows that we used to make fun of. Even the simplest thing that a completely random person could say or do will remind me of a joke between the two of us...and yet I can't laugh about it because no one else could understand but you. So I just smile internally at all these things and remember when...

That's grief. Grief for a living human being.

I miss you. 

I love you. 

Thank you for reading a story from #BehindTheBlogger Hop. Every 2 weeks a group of bloggers is given a writing prompt. These prompts are very open ended, so our bloggers can write about whatever they desire. The main rule is that their blog post directly relates to the topic of that week. The point of this hop is for our readers to get to know us on a personal level.  Please hop along and read all of the blog posts in this weeks hop. Just click the links below. If you want real and raw emotion, then you will find it here. After you read each post, please comment and share. We want to get to know you too!

Are you a blogger looking to join our future hops? Click here Sign Up Here

Mega-Church Myths

Before I started attending Granger Community Church, I was very skeptical about it.
I had spent my whole life in a smaller church. It still used contemporary praise music, which I enjoyed very much…and it was very casual as far as dress. As much as I loved wearing dresses {and still do} there was no rule that said I had to, so I along with the other ladies in the church felt free to wear jeans to our Sunday morning services. Communion was served regularly, I went to Sunday school as a child AND as an adult, I was in youth group through jr. high and high school, and my entire family was very actively involved with our small group. The sermons were very well done and always left me with something to think about for the upcoming week.

My church experience was very…NORMAL.

I'm grateful to have grown up in the church. But it was very difficult trying to leave the church I called my home. I had a hard time finding one I liked in college. I began to just count on coming home on weekends as often as I could, and staying as involved in my church there as often as possible. But after finishing college and then starting to live on my own, I knew I had to find somewhere new to go. It was tough. I just didn't think any other place would compare to the church I loved and missed so much. For months, while living by myself, I didn't go anywhere at all. I had too much anxiety about just walking through the door on my own. And I didn't have any desire to try to find somewhere new to “fit into”. And what if I never found it? But because of this lack of community and fellowship {among other things}, my life was very empty.

Finally, after recognizing how lonely I was, a dear friend of mine invited me to GCC. Like I said before, I was skeptical. In my mind it was the furthest thing from a traditional or “normal” church. I just wasn't sure I would like it.

“It's definitely not for everybody. If you don't like it, my feelings will not be at all hurt.”

It was encouraging to hear my friend say that. And I was very relieved that I would not be going alone.

After attending a couple of times, all of the things I'd heard or believed about mega churches went right out the window. For about a year before I met John-David I continued to go, and ever since he and I met we have gone together {turned out that he had been attending already and we never knew!}.

Now that I've experienced a mega church, and understand what it's all about, I don't think I could ever go back. I wish I had attended first and THEN drawn my own conclusion, before believing the rather subjective opinions I'd heard from other people.

Before I continue, I just want to say this…To each, their own.
Just as my good friend said to me, I will say to you, mega churches are not for everybody.
I am not trying to sway you in one way or another. I am not trying to get you to leave the church you call home and join a mega church. My main objective here is to provide some insight for why anyone would CHOOSE to join a mega church. So the next time you hear someone say, “Oh yeah, my church is a mega church,” you can start thinking of the positives rather than the negatives.  We live in a world where someone always has something to say about what another person does. We are always quick to criticize what others do, then completely lose it if someone tries to critique OUR choices.

Well, I'm hear to share with you a few myths that have been debunked about mega churches, and that I've definitely debunked since my time attending one.

Myth one: The music in the worship service is all about “entertainment”, and it's all for show.

I can easily agree that the music is incredibly entertaining, and can make the worshiping through music experience a whole lot more fun. But the people up on that stage are not doing what they do for SHOW. They are striving for excellence. Scripture tells us “whatever you do, work at it with all of your heart.” And in Proverbs 31, a virtuous woman is described as someone who is skilled in all kinds of arts and activities. She is praised because she creates beautiful things with a great attitude and work ethic, while glorifying the Lord to those around her. God has given her talents to use productively, to further the Kingdom of God. God is pleased with her. And the women AND men I see up on that stage every weekend are all Kingdom Seekers, worshipping and magnifying the name of God. They work very hard at what they do, and their level of professionalism is top notch, but they are not just up there to entertain.

Myth two: Mega churches are too big, and it's impossible to have a sense of community.
It's true that you probably will never know every single person in the congregations. Even people on staff don't know everyone. But there are so many options for ways to get involved and build the community you're looking for. Volunteers are always needed in so many departments. There are needs everywhere that you've probably never even thought of. And my  church, like most others, has an abundance of small groups to sign up for! There's pretty much no way you couldn't find at least one that would fit your schedule to join!

Myth three: Mega churches don't focus on spiritual growth, or theological depth.
This doesn't take much explanation. All I will say is that I've never heard so many incredibly deep, meaningful, thought-provoking sermons in one place, from multiple pastors and speakers who are all so completely different.

Myth four: Mega churches are not diverse.
Yeah... I thought that was the case too before I started attending one. People from all ethnic AND economic backgrounds attend.

Myth five: Mega churches are “in their own little world” and don't focus on outreach.
I don't even think I could count on two hands the ways GCC {and so many other mega churches} reaches out to help and have an impact on the surrounding communities! Our church partners with an incredible community center right in the center of a very low income, inner city area. There, lives are being renewed and transformed all the time! They offer programs for youth and adults alike, and truly display the definition of “love thy neighbor.” And this community center is only ONE of the many ways that the church branches outsides of its doors to share the love of the Lord with the community and the world!

So…friends…

I totally and completely get it if you walk through the door of our church, or any other mega church you may try out, and say, “This just isn't my cup of tea.” It's typically the music that gets people. The music can be hard to identify with for some people. For me personally, it's super important that I love the music because that's how I best connect with God. But if that's not for you, it's not my job to persuade you to stay! That's not my goal here. But next time you jump to a conclusion about what a mega church is really like, let it be an informed conclusion that you've come to yourself. Don't just assume, or believe all the things you may have heard, and create your own version of what is true.

A Breakthrough...& a Proposal!

Friends! I am ENGAGED!!!

Yeah! I know, right?!?!

It's still amazing and wonderful, and although I AM starting to come back down to earth so that I can focus on everything I NEED to get prepared for this summer, I am still floating :))

The proposal happened on Sunday, and I'll get to that. But first, a little story...

The past few weeks leading up to this have been something you might describe using the cliche term "roller coaster".  But looking back on it, I can't believe how evident God's hand was! He was preparing me for this moment the whole time. But my blinders were on, and I couldn't have possibly been aware. 

Let me start off telling you that...yes, I was THAT girl who actually dictated when her boyfriend was going to propose. I'm not someone who typically likes to be surprised. I like to know what is happening. I like to know what is coming. I like to be "prepared" for any big, life changing things {Read: CONTROL!}. So of course, we had been discussing when we planned to get engaged for awhile. He was respectful of the fact that I didn't really want to be surprised. He wanted to make sure I was comfortable. Which I appreciated. HOWEVER...........

The closer it got, the more restless I became. I started to ask myself a lot of questions, and began to overthink every little thing, wondering if any of this was right. And what did right even mean? 

A little over two weeks ago, my anxiety started to build so much that I felt physically sick. My stomach hurt so badly and my appetite was completely gone. I had to force myself to eat. Every muscle in my body was in high levels of pain, so much so that no matter how much Aleve I took, I found no relief. I had to fight off panic attacks, which was the hardest part to deal with. I haven't had a panic attack in over two years! I didn't understand what was wrong with me. I had known for awhile that I did want to get engaged, and that I did want to be married. So what was making me feel so awful?? What was bringing that ultimate highest level of anxiety back that I hadn't experienced in years??

And because my brain works in such extremes {thank you, mental illness for rearing your ugly head again}, I began to wonder if maybe this meant that I was wrong....about everything.

Well, praise the Lord {and I mean, really!} that I have friends who know how to talk me down when I work myself up this much. 

After talking to a very trusted friend about how I was feeling, she helped me realize that trying to micromanage when the proposal would happen is NOT my job. I was spending all my time anticipating the moment because I knew it was coming...and I'm not supposed to see it coming! It's supposed to be a surprise, and it's supposed to be exciting! And it's HIS job, not mine. My only job would be to say yes or no.

After putting everything into this new perspective, I felt a whole lot better. More relaxed. I talked to John-David about this, and I told him, "You propose when you want to propose." And I made up my mind that my answer would be YES.  

THEN...I finally prayed and offered the whole situation up to God, which I had not done yet {my other mistake...again, read: CONTROL}. And that brought me more peace and comfort than ever. My anxiety was gone. My appetite came back. I was no longer in what felt like endless pain. My guard came way down, and I was open to whatever God wanted. No fear. {Yeah, that's what I said...whoa!} I even found myself experiencing bursts of excitement that lasted longer than just a fleeting moment...and that wasn't normal either. Suddenly, I couldn't wait to be engaged!

Fast forward to Sunday morning...

After a great week, filled with joy and peace that only God could provide, I was in church on Sunday morning, listening to an excellent sermon. It was just the icing on the cake! And at the end, the speaker did a "listening prayer" with us, which I talked a little bit about in this post. 

He gave us an opportunity to hear from God directly, which is the way I've been leaning how to pray lately. He asked very specific questions, and allowed us a time of quiet and stillness to hear from God. And for the first time ever, I HEARD. I heard, and it was not seasoned with doubts and questions. No opposing inner voice was trying harder to silence God's voice. The joy and fullness I felt was overwhelming! It was so new, but it was the BEST new! I didn't even know it was possible!

Annnnndddd, fast forward to Sunday night...

It had been a lazy Sunday. My favorite kind. I read in the sunshine all afternoon.

John-David's family had planned a game night with a family friend, which is pretty much a staple in that house. It was nothing out of the ordinary. Now if any of you have played the game Settlers of Catan, you know how complex it can get. It requires asking questions of the other players and trading cards and game pieces and whatnot. Soooo...we're playing the game and everything is normal. John-David finishes his turn, and then he says, "Okay, and I have one more question to ask." Next thing I know he's up from his chair and then back down again, this time on one knee, asking me to marry him. Nothing fancy. Nothing spectacular. I didn't need that. All I needed was, "Emily, will you marry me?" And all I needed to say was, "YES!"

God. Is. Great. He was preparing my heart and I didn't even know it!

Just a reminder, He sees the bigger picture!

One is Silver & the Other Gold...

It's really no secret that I'm super extroverted... 

{although...those who knew me BEFORE the last couple of years will find that difficult to believe. I will share more about that at another time...}

I love to be {and pretty much HAVE to be} around people as often as possible! 

I love long conversations that go on for hours.

I love laughing so hard until I cannot breathe anymore.

I love any opportunity to be with someone and just encourage one another and grow together.

I just love and need people in my life in order to thrive! We were not created to do life alone, and God wired me {and so many others} with an intense need for close, personal relationships!

So I'm here to talk about those type of friends today...those friends who are practically family. God has been calling me to rekindle some "old friendships" that have pretty much dwindled away over the last few years...as well as to take a brave step in allowing some current friendships to reach that next level of closeness.  Relationships with friends are so essential to our well being! We need those people who can speak truth in love to us...who can help turn us around, or lift us back up when times are too hard to handle alone.

Now...we all know what it's like to be hurt by others.

I can think of two specific instances that just completely ruined me.

The first was something that was said to me directly {and more than once}...that other people do not really care about your struggles. That they are just being polite. And of course they are going to tell you what you want to hear! What else would they say? They don't want to hear your melodramatics. All you want is attention.

The second was a friend, an older and wiser {I thought} friend that I poured out my heart to on a regular basis. She always listened intently and even seemed to offer sound advice. There was nothing I did not share with her. She knew absolutely everything about me...the good, bad, and in between. She presented herself as easily trustworthy, so it came as no surprise that pretty much anyone else who knew her fell for her extra sweet, loving, seemingly genuine exterior. And then we all found out how much of a facade that exterior truly was. I was, along with so many others, completely crushed to discover all of her hidden motives she kept behind her mask of feigned kindness. I was in total disbelief and my heart ached greatly as the same difficult truths were revealed to me through many sources. I cried for an entire week, as if grieving over a death. And in a way, I was...as it was the death of a friendship. I didn't feel like I could ever come back from this...or that I could ever fully trust someone in that way ever again.

We've all been there. We've felt that kind of pain. And, unfortunately, we carry it with us. Even if we don't think about it on a regular basis, it hinders new relationships from growing. 

In college, I was blessed beyond measure by wonderful people with whom I was able to connect! Between brilliant, caring professors, to other talented peers in the music department, I had never been around so many people who could inspire me more, or bless me further than these people from Bethel College could! They were some of the most encouraging, totally authentic, God-loving people! And I wanted to BE them! But still...I kept them at arms length. After being told on many occasions that people didn't really care about me, I was fairly certain that I was not worthy of being loved by these people, or even loving them! They were so amazing! I was not amazing. I could never be like them. In my mind, I was both "unlikeable", and unlovable. As much as I tried to "remake" myself into the kind of person I knew THEY would like, I never truly liked myself. Therefore, I didn't expect anyone else to like me either. Even when I did make a real and genuine connection, I was so convinced that they wouldn't be in it for the long haul anyway. Why invest when they are most likely just going to leave me anyway? What makes me think that I'm capable of being enough to make people want to stay? Apparently the one person I used to trust more than anyone in the world didn't think so.

Since college, I have grown so much as a person, and the Lord has brought even more incredible people into my life. I've even been able to tell when He's been super intentional and said, "Hey, see this person? She's for you. She's a sister-friend." I'm so grateful for these "sister types" in my life. BUT...again...my ability to be raw, real, and fully open with them is hindered by past hurts. I just don't think I could handle another horrible heartache. I can't lose someone else THAT important to me again. I desire deeper friendships, and yet I push against that. I fear that if I push for it, that I'll be pushing too hard...and ultimately push them away. These people have never given me any reason to question or doubt them. And they have given me EVERY reason to believe that they are with me to stay. And done nothing but pray for, love, and encourage me. But I wait for the other shoe to drop. 

Can anyone else identify? It's so hard. It's such a self-sabotaging tendency. 

And it's really not fair to them. Because they were not the ones who hurt me. They don't deserve the expectations I've placed on them!

Those old college friendships? They faded away because I chose to end them. I decided that they were insincere people who were just pretending to love me.
The new and current friendships in my life? They don't yet have the depth that I so long for, because I continue to keep them at arms length. I've chosen to believe that they are going to be like these other people who hurt me.

That's not okay.

That's why God is slowly healing my heart, tearing down the walls {click here}. The enemy doesn't like it when God is in ANYTHING! And that includes friendships. So, yes, he's going to try and divide them with doubts and fears. But God can restore everything, if we allow Him. And He can make anything flourish, if we allow Him. I'm excited that He's leading me back to those old friendships, and giving me the desire to be intentional, and continue growing new ones.

Make new friends,

but keep the old.

One is SILVER,

and the other GOLD.

I value YOU, not your vote!

I tend to stay away from posting political memes, articles, statuses, etc. on social media.

I don't comment on other people's political posts either. I'm not interested in arguing with people. That is the complete opposite of who I am, and who everyone knows me to be! To fight with someone and to have them become angry at me is absolutely the worst feeling ever!

But...wait!

I have to stop and think for a minute. 

If someone is angry with me over my OPINION {and, let's be honest friends...a political stance is just that...an OPINION}, or if I become angry with someone else over theirs, how is that building our relationship and making it better?

I am ALL FOR advocating for your passions! I do it all the time {here on this blog in fact!}, and I constantly ENCOURAGE others to speak up for what they are passionate for. I love that! But if you post anything at all that you believe in strongly, you are opening yourself up to negative comments as well.

I've even gotten negative comments and opposing viewpoints myself, which I kind of expect, and yet at the same time it bothers me a lot. But why?

The fact is that I am WAY too concerned with being liked by everyone. 

And in the world we live, if someone doesn't agree with you, well, it MUST mean that they don't like you. I'm not saying everyone is like that, of course, but in many, many ways, that's what we see all over the place. 

So when someone gives me their opposing view, it stings a little and I feel like I have to defend myself, and then also word my response perfectly so that they don't think "less" of me. 

But, again...wait!

I have to remind myself that if people truly do respect me as an individual, a difference of opinion is not going to change my relationship with them. Or at least it shouldn't. And if it does, then it's not a real, deep, intentional friendship or relationship.

Some of my dearest friends in the world have different political views from mine. And we're perfectly aware of those differences. Does it change our friendship? No way! Because that's not what matters to us. Even in my extended family, I know for a fact that not everyone's perspective or opinion is going to be the same as mine. But that doesn't change the fact that I love them dearly and respect them as PEOPLE.

Personally, if I am actually asked about what I think, I tend to be very "middle of the road" politically. On some issues, I lean very far right, and on others I lean very far left. And still on some, I have no idea because sometimes it's just impossible to understand it all {ha}! But I don't label myself as REPUBLICAN or DEMOCRAT. That's not what I put my faith in. It's not what matters most to me. All of those things associated with politics are going to fade away eventually...and only the Word of God will remain forever. That's where my authority lies, and the Lord is to Whom I remain faithful. 

Is it important to form an opinion? Yes! Is it important to place your vote? Absolutely! But there is always, always, always going to be someone who doesn't agree with you, and with whom you will not agree. 

But here's what I'm trying to get across here...

My friendship with you...my relationship with you...is SO MUCH more valuable to me than your political stance!

The way I see it, politics are SO not worth jeopardizing a connection...or potential connection...you have with someone!

And I'm going to stop being so scared that if someone doesn't agree with me, it changes their view of me. Because if it DOES, well, then I'm not the one with the problem. And that's not a relationship I want to invest in. 

My perspective will always be, first of all, what would God have to say about this? And secondly, how would Jesus treat this person if they were standing right in front of him? 

My goal is to be the hands and feet of Jesus, and to live life INTENTIONALLY...and that's completely genuine on my end! That's not me trying to get everyone to like me more. That's me being the woman God has called me to be.

Choosing to be defined by my political stance is not how I want to live my life.

And it is not how I choose to see the people around me either. 

There is so much more to all of us than just that.

 

Some "Gems" from the CCM Genre

I have found, all too often, that the task of finding artists in the Contemporary Christian music genre who are UNIQUE, ORIGINAL, or SUBSTANTIAL can be rather difficult.

So many CCM artists today have songs that pretty much reiterate the exact same things, just rearranging the wording somehow. Or they simply follow the same chord progression over and over...and you really can't tell which song it is until it gets to the chorus. They remain incredibly surface-y, and...well...for lack of a better word....kinda "hokey" a lot of the time.

I was very much turned off from CCM music because of this for a very long time.
I wanted to hear songs that were fully rooted in biblical truths. I wanted songs with lyrics that ran much deeper and that could make me think. Music is in my soul, and it's how I connect with just about everything, and that's how I like to connect with God too. But all of the songs I was hearing on the radio just were not doing that for me.

For so many of us, the struggle is real!  I've seen Facebook statuses, and Twitter posts about this! I've had several conversations with people in my life about this! Why does it seem that there are so few Contemporary Christian artists out there who offer biblical and "non-cheesy" music? Well, I've been doing some digging...and I've managed to weed out some great ones! Just to help the rest of you out ;))

In no particular order, here are some incredible CCM artists that are so worth listening to, and whose lyrics go deeper than just scratching the surface...

Danny Gokey
He was an American Idol contestant, and has an absolutely killer voice! His lyrics speak with genuine conviction of painful, challenging, real life experiences...and the hope that has seen him through all of it. The words in this song were ultimately what brought me back around to listening to Christian music again...

Plumb
Singer Tiffany Lee, aka Plumb, knows about stuff, let me tell you! She writes about deeply personal issues...like this song bravely written about self injury. And, in my opinion, her voice kind of reminds me of Amy Lee from Evanescence.

Brandon Heath
Brandon has a beautiful testimony of God's grace in his life. His songs reflect all of that on his own personal level, but his words will resonate with just about everyone. But even so, songs like this one will really get you thinking about certain things that you may just overlook or take for granted in every day life. {oh! And p/s....he also has a great Christmas album!}

Matthew West
Another great guy with great stories, but there is one thing in particular that I love about Matthew West...His songs are inspired by the stories he hears from OTHERS!  Real life people with real life struggles, who have found hope in Christ themselves! Like this one, based on the story of a woman who nearly lost her daughter in a serious car accident, and learned what strength that comes from the Lord truly is. {and yes, he also has a fantastic Christmas album!}

Meredith Andrews
Meredith bravely speaks out about her struggles with doubt and fear throughout her lyrics. And yes, it's true that doubt and fear are things that every Christian struggles with at one point or another, but Meredith is so honest about how low she actually was!
This line here, "You cry yourself to sleep, because the hurt is real, and the pain cuts deep. All hope seems lost, with heartache your closest friend, and everyone else long gone. You've had to face the music on your own..." described so perfectly what life was like for me when I went through a really dark season of deep depression. And to me, Meredith clearly understood what that meant.

NeedToBreathe
Okay...where do I even start with these guys! They are awesome! First of all, not a single one of their songs sounds like the one before it. They are the very definition of unique! Secondly, I think that NeedToBreathe has some of the most biblically grounded truths in their music that I've ever heard from A Christian group. I had a hard time choosing just one song of theirs to share with you here {seriously! They are all just THAT good! Go find all...the...songs!!}. But I do think this one is my favorite, especially going back to how wonderful and unique just their SOUND is, as well as the words! Really though, if you don't listen to any other song on this list, just listen to THIS ONE!!

Caedmon's Call
Beautiful acoustics, beautiful vocals, originality that I've literally never heard from anyone else! And they are way lesser known than they should be! They've pretty much disappeared over the last few years, which is unfortunate. I love listening to them!

Switchfoot
This is kind of a "bonus" one, as Switchfoot isn't exclusively a Christian band, although they do have multiple songs that mention God directly. BUT, sprinkled throughout ALL of their lyrics are truths on which to build our lives. In this way, lead singer and songwriter Jon Foreman ministers to and influences Christians and non-Christians alike. This one's my personal favorite...

Hope you were able to discover some great new music here! Or maybe you were reminded of a song or artist you forgot about and need to listen to again! Either way, there's some great Christian music out there, friends! And it's not all cliche!

Did I leave anyone out? Who else should I have included on this list? Comment below!